Hope is my least favourite feeling. People are starting to ask me if I’m excited about starting neuro rehab with the PONS device in a couple weeks. I don’t feel like explaining my complicated emotional landscape to them. I know they mean well, but I’m not going to an all-inclusive resort for a vacation. Some …
My disease and disability in not a moral failing. It’s not because I’m a bad person or I made a stupid decision like drunk driving, or I didn’t know how to be healthy. See below for evidence. I was fit, active, and healthy. Until I wasn’t. I have a disease and it’s left me disabled. …
In the past year and a bit, I lost everything but I found what matters. For all the bad, there’s been a lot of good too. Emotionally and mentally, I feel better than I have in a really long time. The upside of getting sick and then the arrival of Covid? I finally felt like …
Last year, I didn’t just lose my ability to walk unassisted, all my money, my ability to work, and my faith in people. I lost myself too, and I didn’t even realize until recently. Someone I hadn’t seen in quite awhile saw me recently with my cane. I could tell my cane upset them. When …
At the end of July, I signed up for the Ring of Kerry virtual challenge, because I’m crazy. My very existence now is a challenge, so why not add a little something extra? The virtual Ring of Kerry challenge is 124 miles (200km) either walking, running, or cycling. I can’t walk more than a mile …
The last several days have given me a couple of kicks to the face, and every night I dream about running. It’s a bit weird, because I never loved running. I was a decent sprinter and I did a few 5ks but I hated every moment of it. I did it for my health, not …
I had an appointment with my family doctor just before the weekend. She’s a rural physician, and she’s amazing. I totally trust her being in charge of my healthcare. I’m undecided about MS medication, though. I had a really long talk with her about it. I really don’t want to take the medication. The more …
In case FunSucker is a new word for you: A FunSucker is one who, or that which, sucks the fun out of things or people. Also known as Debbie Downer or Rainer of Parades. I felt almost fully recovered. It took months, but I was able to run again. Back to working out 5 days …
Friday was a bad day. It hadn’t been, until someone unexpectedly phoned me from the MS clinic, and the conversation sent me into an emotional tailspin thanks to PTSD issues. It probably didn’t help that I was 70 hours into a mimicked fast and had just started my period. I was hangry, crampy, and when …
The last few weeks have been fantastic. I’m hopeful that I’m finally recovering from this MS relapse. I’ve done two fasting mimicking cycles in three weeks (see my post about it here) and I feel really good. I had leg heaviness for six months that made stairs really hard. It resolved a few weeks ago, …
